Most Needlessly Complicated Sex Act Ever?

Most Needlessly Complicated Sex Act Ever?


"All right! Very good! Now bring out the tap-dancing chickens and the flaming wiener dogs!" Image source: Training of O. com.

Training of O.com is proud to announce the invention of a new sex act, the Double Reverse Frobbish Nubbin-ride. To do it properly requires six to 12 naked slave girls, two to four vibrators, a calliope, a complete set of the Encyclopedia Britannica, and a choreographer. Supposedly the orgasms are tremendous, if only from the relief of not having to perform the sex act any more. Word is that the Guinness Book of World Records is looking into it to determine if this is indeed, the most needlessly complicated sex act ever. We'll keep you posted!
New Big-Budget Hercules Movie: Slave Girl Imagery?

New Big-Budget Hercules Movie: Slave Girl Imagery?


"Leather diaper epic? Yah, I think I can handle it!" Image source: vidcap of Dwayne Johnson in "The Scorpion King."

The news feeds are abuzz with word that a new Hercules movie will be coming out, directed by Brett Ratner and starring Dwayne Johnson of "Scorpion King" fame. I like the casting of Johnson for the lead, he has the looks for the role of Hercules and he has a flair for comedy, maybe they are planning to bring back the lighthearted feel that made the original sword and sandal epics so much fun. (I honestly doubt this, the modern standards for violence and bloodshed are too compelling and will just suck the lightheartedness right out of the movie. It's ultimately why I don't like Spartacus despite all the sexy, sexy slavegirls.)

But the real question for this blog is, of course, how will the slavegirl imagery be handled? As the author of Hottitude of Servitude: Slavegirls In the Movies and On TV, I am the greatest authority on this topic, possibly because I'm the only one. I do hope some kind soul will send Brett Ratner and his production designer copies of the book so they could be informed. I'll be they'd be crestfallen if they were to miss the chance to read "Hottitude of Servitude."

I thought of a variety of ways I could describe the probable costuming that will exist in the movie. But really, a series of lightly captioned pictures should do the trick.


Dream of this. Never gonna happen, of course ... but you CAN dream! If there's any slave girl sex, you can be just about certain it will be "tasteful" and won't involve any bondage. Or, probably, onscreen nudity. Image source: Whipped Ass.com.


Hope for this. The nudity is unlikely, but possible, after all, Spartacus has shown just how nicely naked slavegirls can enliven a sword and sandal epic. Much more likely will be a thong and a tiny bra or pasties to cover the nipples for family considerations. Image source: Found it on Crueltimur's gallery, no idea who created it, but it's a fine piece of art, somebody let me know if you know.


Expect this. Because, c'mon. Hollywood is running a good fifty years behind its audiences nowadays. Image source: vidcap from the 1973 film "The Amazons," which to be fair has some VERY tasty naked slavegirls elsewhere in the film. Including lesbian wrassing.

Aesthetics of Bondage Test

Aesthetics of Bondage Test


Examine this image carefully. You will be tested! Image source: Sex and Submission.com.

All right, we have the bondagette tied with brown straps in a variation on the Savage Fold, we have her labia spread with straps, we have her anus held open by a glass butt plug. Your question: is the gag she is wearing the proper gag to go with the rest of her bondage, aesthetically speaking?


It's a ball gag, but is it the right gag? Image source: Sex and Submission.com.

Answer in the comments section.
70 Million Shades of Grey, Hooray!

70 Million Shades of Grey, Hooray!


"I know you want to scream in pleasure but we must keep you silenced!" Image source: Public Disgrace.com.

A recent article in Jezebel.com has announced that Fifty Shades of Grey, having sold 70 million copies in 2012, half of them ebook sales) singlehandedly helped the Bertelsman group (the company that owns Random House) maintain overall group profit levels despite stagnant conditions in its TV, magazine, and music publishing businesses.

I'm very pleased that Fifty Shades has been so successful, it's my hope that it ushers in a whole new era of acceptance and enjoyment of kinky erotic romances, even if some publishers are trying to prevent that. But Jezebel.com is a lot more conflicted on the topic of Fifty Shades. On the one hand, they probably understand that many of their readers bought and enjoyed Fifty Shades. On the other hand, a lot of their readers, either because they are antisex gender feminists who hate any depiction of maledom/femsub anything, or are lit-crit types who can't tolerate sexy romances and the slutty women who read them, absolutely HATE Fifty Shades of Grey.

That's why I love the article, because short as it is it almost explodes with the tension between happily reporting Fifty Shades' success, and snarking the hell out of its success. The article has snark going in opposite directions. On the one hand, it describes Fifty Shades of Grey as "E.L. James' cult sadomasochistic masterwork" implying it's a cultish porn novel (that Somehow sold 70 million copies). But it also takes a slam at the lit-crit crowd, pointing out that Fifty Shades' high level of ebook sales may be because unlike other books, it invites "the book-shaming eyerolls of MFA-holding Barnes & Noble cashiers."

A nice commentary on our economy, the value of a Master of Fine Arts degree, and the probable status of the lit-crit crowd's louder voices.

A very tasty bit of writing, very revealing to the discerning eye. Enjoy!
Today's Bondage Tempest In A Teapot

Today's Bondage Tempest In A Teapot


India's got 999,999,999 problems but this ad ain't one of them. Image source: almost every news site on the Web yesterday. Maybe broadcast TV, too, but who watches that any more?

A recent ad not run in India by Ford's advertising agency has got the Web media in a furor.

Wait ... not run? That's right, Ford never ran the ad, the ads "somehow" got leaked to the media. So, at some point someone said, don't run this ad. So in essence all this furor is over something that did not happen. But in another respect, it's something that did happen ... that Ford has no responsibility for.

But what's wrong with the ad, you wonder? It looks like a goofy, funny play on damsel in distress themes as seen in SO MANY TV shows and movies and such, with former Italian prime minister Silvio Berlusconi driving around with three bound, gagged women representing his political troubles (the hot, ball-gagged policewoman is especially nice, looks like an Alazar damsel) in the spacious trunk of his Ford.

The ad is arousing a furor because it comes on the tails of the infamous Delhi rape, in which a gang of young men attacked a young couple on a public bus, severely beating the husband and raping the wife to death. To. Death. They used something described as an "iron rod" to sodomize her. The horrific case aroused an international furor, and much of Indian society, especially female Indian society, was as furored as anyone else.

Apparently there is a huge rape culture problem in India, which I presciently covered before the Delhi rape. It's fueled by a large population of uneducated, poor, often illiterate young men who have little prospect of finding a decent place in Indian society (and by all accounts, you REALLY don't want to live in any of the indecent places in Indian society) and with little or no prospect of getting laid, as India has sadly absorbed the memes of sexual prudery from the Muslims and the Victorian Brits.


These Indian temple sculptures represent the distant past of Indian culture. Sadly, it's easy to understand how a culture which was once so vigorously, happily sex-positive as represented here, could turn into a rape-infested festival of prudery one billion strong. Image source: the Web.

India needs to deal directly with the social, political and other factors that made this rape happens, and the perpetrators (who have been found) need to experience the full extent of justice for their crimes. (I am anti-death penalty but some criminals do things so horrible that I can't be bothered to care about them, no matter what their fate. The New Delhi rapists fall into that category, for me.)

Maybe it's not a good idea to have a culture that ensures you will have a large population of young men (and women) that can't make money or get laid or get some basic respect in their culture. Four hour movies full of dancing and singing happy people might not be enough to make up for that, y'know?

But here's the thing. The ad images are fantasy imagery. Fun, lighthearted fantasy imagery. The Delhi rape was real life. They're not the same thing. They should not be conflated. Cartoon Silvio Berlusconi driving around with cartoon hotties bound and gagged in the trunk of his car is not about the Delhi rape, though to judge from the many, many pearl-clutching posts about it that I've read, you'd think that the Ford ad (which never ran) was virtually a CELEBRATION of the Delhi rape.

Come on, people, stay on the sane track. Reality, fantasy, two different things. Not the same! How many times do I have to tell you this?


There's also this ad showing Paris Hilton driving around with the Kardashians bound and gagged in the trunk of a nice Ford car, which ALSO did not run. There's even an ad with three men bound and gagged in the back of a car, which not only did not run, but did not get covered. Well, at least the media is getting something right. Image source: every damn news/celebrity website in existence.
Cameron Diaz And Tina Fey Lesbian Bondage Sex?

Cameron Diaz And Tina Fey Lesbian Bondage Sex?


"Hi, moms!" Image source: Kinklive.com.
You know, it's not often that I wonder, "What if Cameron Diaz and Tina Fey were to get naked and have lesbian sexual bondage? And what if Cameron Diaz were to put on a sex harness and a strap-on dildo, and Tina Fey were to be naked with her hands tied behind her back, and still wearing her glasses of course and sucking on Cameron's strap-on?" That's actually a pretty rare thought, strangely enough. But on those rare occasions when I DO wonder about that, I imagine it would look something like the image at the top of this post.
On Mesh Breasts And The Real Thing

On Mesh Breasts And The Real Thing


Mmmm, mesh breasts as seen on the Gorean Dressing Room blog.
Back in the old days, female avatars in Second Life had just two choices with regard to breasts: the ones that came with the avatar, and prim breasts. Both have advantages and disadvantages. Avatar breasts have bounce. But they can only grow so big before they get ... polygonal. What do we mean, polygonal?



"See my giant polygons? Do they make you hot, baby?"
We mean POLYGONS! That's standard avatar breasts scaled up to the max and seen up close, about as bad as it gets, but you have to admit ... that's bad. As the camera draws back the polygonality disappears, but still ... that's pretty bad. Especially compared to those nice, round, smooth mesh breasts seen above.

Prim breasts don't have this problem, they are smooth and round, but they are like any article of prim clothing, which means they can be very hard to fit properly. And it's annoying when clothes won't quite fit or get out of alignment when the avatar moves, but it's really unfortunate with body parts.



Prim nipples on giant polygon breasts ... who can resist, eh?
Just check out the unusually well-fitting and color-matched nipples above. Nice as they are, one of the nipples is slightly higher than the other, they are kind of the wrong size and shape for those huge honkin headlights they sit on. When you move, such nipples can get discombobulated, and actually seem to be floating a short distance away from the breast, or sunken into it. So ... not optimal.

Now check out the prim breasts at the very top of the page. They have that 3D nipple bump and nice, smooth curves. They look like breasts should look. The only problem is, some of the inhabitants of Second Life have taken a good idea and supersized it waaaay too much, as this article points out.




As a wise woman once told me on this very blog, "Ain't nothing like the real thing" and Rachel Roxx convincingly makes that point here. I say "convincingly" because I'm pretty sure Rachel's breasts have implants. But she bought wisely, enough to give her an impressive rack but not to make her look weird or distorted. No polygons on her! Image source: Whipped Ass.com.







Visit My Second Life Gor Blog!

Visit My Second Life Gor Blog!


A new place to hang out and dig on Second Life Gor and other sexy, sexy slavegirl video game thingies!

I've taken my Second Life Gor related posts and created a new blog with them, much as I did with my Fifty Shades of Grey related posts. It will be a place to easily find the stuff I've written on the topic, and also I'll put posts there that aren't necessarily appropriate for the more kinky, social-observation, newsy topics you'll find on politically sexy. Or I may turn it into a Mechwarrior blog. Hell, I'm capable of it!

Given its more adult subject matter, my SL Gor will be adultly illustrated, unlike my Fifty Shades blog.

Nightstands Finally Advertised Based On Actual Uses

Nightstands Finally Advertised Based On Actual Uses


"Sure beats a box under the bed!" Image source: Training of O.com.

An article in the Minneapolis St. Paul Business Journal demonstrates the further mainstreaming of bondage. They cite a nightstand sold by local manufacturer Blu-Dot. The online ad copy for the Modu-licious Nightstand says, it will hold, "Ten T-9 Ball Gags, one box of tissues, and six copies of Architectural Digest."

OK, so the nightstand costs $599. If your lifestyle is such that you need storage space for ten ballgags, expensive nightstands are probably the least of your worries!

And when local business journals are reporting on bondage gear storage devices ... well, things have changed!
Left Holding The Ball

Left Holding The Ball


"Master said, if the thought of being whipped bothers you, I will let you hold my ball while I whip you, does that not show trust?" Image source: Training of O.com.